Okay, the easiest way to stop looking so kook-like (nothing wrong with that though) is to make sure you are positioned correctly on your board.  Your nose should be riding slightly above the water, not a half a foot above the water.  Paddling will be much more difficult, and you will never be able to get your weight down the face of the wave.  Don't be afraid to drop into the wave.  If you take off on a wave and pearl (falling nose first), you can always adjust and back up a couple of inches.  In the long run, it's better that you are pearling than to never have taken off at all!

No, we are not talking about erections here.  We are talking about popping up on your surfboard when you are trying to stand up.  The easiest way to screw up a wave is to cum to your knees.  You want to pop up to your feet.  It's not as simple as you may think.  Take some time out to practice your pop-ups on land.  It's hard to explain over the internet, but here is what you will want to do:
1) Push down on your board slightly (even turning it toward the side you want to go a little)...if you have done yoga, this is the position you are in immediately before downward dog.
2) Slide your feet forward.  Do not stick out your butt into outer space, waiting for doggie style.  You want to slide your feet through as your tailBONE tucks underneath your body. 
This will eliminate the knee pop-up.  You will have more time to balance...Also don't straighten up right away...your balance is better with a lower center of gravity, and you can turn better with bent knees. 
So go get bent :D...

THE NATIVES ARE RESTLESS

Don't go surfing on a reservation and expect everyone to be treated like you are in the city.  Visiting a reservation is like visiting another country.  Here are some tips to keep safe:  Be careful of fire placement...otherwise you will get drunk dudes fighting at about 11:30pm.  Know when to leave the area when dudes are getting out-of-hand.  Whatever you do, do not talk back or try to reason with a drunk native (or white local).  Compliment them on their culture.  Do not be a cock-tease with the locals.  Maybe a 50% cock-tease is fine...just enough to so that they let you surf there.  100% cock-tease, and you are asking for trouble.  Remember, also in the PNW and in surfing the ratio of men to women is 8:1.  One girl can cause the dudes to start competing for attention, which can lead to fights.  Take this seriously!!!  Surfing out here is not like shopping in Bellevue! Recently a girl was punched square in the face.  NO girl deserves that, but there might have been things that could have been done to avoid such an unfortunate incident. 

TURNING HEADS MAKES IT EASIER TO CATCH WAVES 

When you pop up, make sure you turn (your pussy)... You should be looking in the direction parallel to the shoreline, not straight in to the beach! In other words, look where you  want (your pussy) to go.  That means snapping your face/eyeballs left or right immediately after popping up.  Or point your fingertips in the direction you want (your pussy) to go.  Your shoulders will turn and your bottom should follow (and your pussy).  Next time you come in to shore on your board, test the difference between looking straight ahead and turning your head (your pussy) to the left.  Even when you are not standing, it makes a difference where your board (your pussy) goes.